When we yearn to “be loved”, we ‘re relying on someone else to give that love to us. We want that love because we believe that having that love will make us feel “whole”, cherished, beautiful, important, and valued. But the truth is, no-one can do all that for you, no matter how much they love you.
If you want to feel all those wonderful things, you need to love yourself. When you love yourself, you’re able to:
- Recognise and embrace all of you – your strengths and your weaknesses.
- Give yourself whatever you need that day, whether it’s encouragement, or a little peace.
- Stop criticising yourself because you recognise that we’re all human and bound to fail at times.
- Know that you’re enough – for anyone, and anything you dream of doing.
- Have the confidence to create the life you desire.
So how do you do that? Here are a few ideas.
- Make a list of all you’ve achieved. This is one of the first exercises I give my clients. Open your eyes to how capable you are.
- Talk to yourself as though you were your best friend. How would you comfort, guide and inspire her?
- Ask what you need today. It may something as simple as a lunchtime walk, or as complex as extra assistance at work. Act on what comes up.
- See yourself through the eyes of someone who loves you. The day you were born, your mother looked upon you as though you were the most perfect human on earth. You are still the same person.
- Live in integrity. If you tell yourself you’re going to do something, keep that promise.
- Trust your own judgement. You do not need the opinions and advice of others. You have your own intuition to guide you to the right decision for you.
- Don’t hold back from buying things that make you feel good. Treat yourself to that massage, bunch of flowers, or gourmet meal. You enjoy giving to others so sometimes, give to yourself.
- Practice having conversations with yourself. Ask how you want to feel, what you need, or how you can enjoy today. Then listen to the answers.
How would you feel if you did all this? Wouldn’t you fall in love again, with yourself? After all this person speaks kindly to you, listens to you, cherishes you, can be trusted, and you can have so much fun with!
And the best bit? That person is you!
Do you feel unworthy of love? Is your life less than it could be and you yearn for change? As your coach, I can encourage you to dream bigger, recognise your worth in the world and achieve what deep down you’ve never dared admit. Want to talk to find out more? Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.